Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Fear of Man

"As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts." ~Isaiah 55:9

I am beginning to realize just how hard it is for me to believe these words.

My head tells me that there is truth in the promises You make, that the plans You have for me are better by far than anything of my wildest imaginings. My mind's eye can see all the ways in which You might use me, might mold me into the child You want me to be. I understand that there is nothing for me in this world if I do not have You.

But my heart is yet sinful. I place my hope not in You who will never fail me but in the people who always seem to let me down. My heart aches to be loved, to be filled with tangible faces, even if it means trading in Your completeness for a broken image of Your grace. I fear their judging eyes and sharp tongues, but even more, I fear their absence. Amidst this crowd of people, I still find myself alone.

Yet it is here, in this loneliness, that I can hear Your voice calling me to Your side, calling me to fulfill Your dreams at the expense of my own. Grant me the courage to toss aside all that I hold dear in pursuit of that which will never let me down! Return to my soul the only life worth pursuing!